Bee’s Wisdom Hive – A Diamond is NOT His Love

Four C's - diamonds

Sis, can I drop some words into your spirit? We as women are powerful when we are on one accord and standing in God’s presence and His mission and call on our lives. That is when we are truly validated as the daughter He has called us to be…then and ONLY THEN are WE a true Queen.

So, ladies, I was reflecting recently. It hit me yesterday that this month 26 years ago I got married. I have NO idea why that dropped into my spirit. I NEVER revisit this month. In fact, since my divorce in 2002, I RARELY think about that part of my life. Thus, I can only ascertain there is a reason behind this.

Later this month, I am teaching married women about what they SHOULD do for their husbands. Go figure. Me the divorcee, right? LOL! Well, the reality is QB is obedient to whatever the Lord gives her.

Yesterday, I looked at my wedding bands. They truly are beautiful and yes I kept them. At one point I was going to rip them apart and make a diamond necklace. That was AFTER I took them to a pawn shop and the lady offered me $25 for them. I looked at her like she was crazy. I KNEW how much they cost back in 1988. Are YOU KIDDING ME!! This Queen knows about diamonds. LOL! Marx Nix as my father would say. I left the shop truly insulted! LOL!

This morning, I pulled out my appraisal and assessed the ring’s value. The set was not purchased at a jewelry chain, and let’s just say from 1988 to 1993 it went up in value. In fact over $900. It is a two-set; very understated (yup that would be me) ring, that is a bit over 1 carat and is VVS in clarity and G-H in color. In case you didn’t know ladies, that’s pretty nice for love back in the day, LOL. The engagement portion of the ring has five diamonds as does the wedding band. Back in the day, nobody in my circle had five diamonds at the outset. My understanding later is that many women were a bit envious. Note that last word, envious. Sis, NEVER let envy drive your life!

I have since learned that many times the ring is more for OUR friends than about the man. Most men do what we request because it keeps US happy. But think about it Sis, they are NOT the ones WEARING the ring, but they ARE PURCHASING IT. And let’s keep it 100, many of us equate his love to the size of the ring. Today, people spend astronomical amounts on their wedding and forget to prepare for the marriage. Far too many couples call it quits after six months, a year or two years. Most times, the woman keeps the ring. Sigh.

Sis, where did we get the notion that the 4 C’s have ANYTHING TO DO WITH LOVE? Trust me I LOVE diamonds. Well, I also love pearls too! At some point in my existence, I said to myself, “Self, WHY do you HAVE to choose?” So, I don’t. At some point, I came to a conclusion that the next time around I didn’t want a ring, and would prefer a diamond tennis bracelet. See, I learned the ring has NOTHING to do with LOVE! Although, as I pause for about 10 seconds, it is a token gesture that the man will honor and cherish me. But think about it Sis, it is ONLY SYMBOLIC. Yes, the circle is unbroken, but it is metal, hard, cold and sturdy. Its molecular structure can withstand high pressure; while many of us who attempt marriage ARE broken and snap at the slightest confrontation.

Oh, BTW, I changed my mind about the ring. Nah, I don’t want a bracelet. Just something to symbolize his outward gesture to the world that I am his. Many of us cheat with rings but that’s ANOTHER blog!

My marriage ended in shambles. It was a Teaching Lesson Defining Moment. My life BLEW up literally before my eyes. It was very public and extremely humiliating. The house, the rings, the fur, the cars, NOTHING could equate to ACTIONS in my mind. I am a builder. I look for solutions, but metal will NOT save a marriage. So Sis, as you consider that man, consider what he’s attempting to do to show he loves YOU. But more importantly, examine HIS 4 C’s! Many components of a man fall under these categories. Is he consistent? Is his character spot on? Does he display signs of caring for others? Meaning, is chivalry his middle name? And last but not least is he funny? Comedy is necessary for the spice of life!

See, your ring size and his purchase are not as important as his ability to be the epitome of a man’s 4 C’s. Remember a King MUST PROTECT THE QUEEN. Sis, YOU are the Queen!

Well Sis, that’s all I have for today. I pray something was given that will spark your spirit to begin a relationship with your Creator, so He can assist you in loving that man properly.

Love ya sis and BE BLESSED until we meet again…My prayers are with you Queen and remember to watch your tone, not just with men but with everyone you interact with on a daily basis for you never know what doors you might OPEN OR CLOSE based on your communication skills.

Much Love!

Belinda aka Queen Bee


6:45 AM

Hmm.. yeah…here’s my set 😉

Wedding ring 9-5-14


Leave a Comment